I pride myself on coping. Maybe I shouldn’t, but I do. When life gets tough, I’m pretty good at managing it. I’m self aware, so I can normally sense what is happening as it happens. I’m not stupid, so I can piece together why I feel the way I do and I can normally make sense of situations. I’m a talker and a big thinker, so I process til the cows come home and then I’m normally okay. I think it’s a good thing to posses the above skills. Life isn’t perfect and it will inevitably have day to day problems and so honing the above skills probably wouldn’t go astray. However I think there is definitely a risk to becoming a pro coper.

Are you at all like me? I thought perhaps I was the most unique person in the world, and for sure, I am a bit weird and there’s definitely parts of me which are unlike anyone else (for example, I’m not remotely afraid of robbers of thiefs when I live alone – what girl is like that?) but I’m coming to realise more and more that people can identify with things I thought I was alone in. Are you an over-thinker and an under-feeler? I cringe at how bad the english is in that statement but still.

Sometimes, when life calls for it, I take a moment to sit somewhere, preferably a nice mix between sunshine and shade and I allow myself to feel. Whatever the feeling is, good or bad, I allow myself to feel it. Sometimes I write.. thoughts or feelings I never knew or really understood somehow form on the pages. Sometimes I sit and listen to some worship, and God speaks to me about hidden things. Sometimes.. I just kick off my shoes and curl up on a park bench and wait. Feel and wait. Wait and feel.

The problem with shutting yourself off to feelings isn’t actually that you shut yourself off to pain, it’s that you shut yourself off to beauty. By avoiding the painful emotions, you inevitably shun joy.

Life is a curious mix of heart aches and heart warming moments. Learn to love and live through both of them. To me, the highs in life are when you feel God leaning down on you and blowing you a sweet little kiss that seems to say ‘See how wonderful life can be’. The lows in life are when you feel God leaning down and almost literally embracing you saying ‘See how wonderful you are to me’. Both are extremely critical moments in life.

Please please please, give yourself permission to feel. Coping is a ridiculous notion. Don’t become good at coping. What a stupid skill.

“I believe that suffering is part of the narrative, and that nothing really good gets built when everything’s easy. I believe that loss and emptiness and confusion often give way to new fullness and wisdom.” Shauna Niequist, Bittersweet


Office Etiquette – A thorough guide


After nearly 3 years in an office admin position (Yes — I’m suprised I’m still here too) I’ve learnt a few things about how an office does and doesn’t run smoothly. The one key to avoiding stressful deadlines, cat fights and overal office mayhem is and maybe always will be, office staff.
I’ve developed a few key principles that if adhered to — could solve almost all workplace tension.
Obey and enjoy.
Principle No. 1 ~ An awareness of office smells
This principle pertains to any smells that arise in the office.
  • The food that is consumed by staff members on site. Garlic, tuna etc should be avoided at all costs. While you may enjoy your tuna sandwhich, 90% of the staff HATE the smell of tuna and you will remove yourself from their ‘good books’ for the rest of the afternoon while your lunch stinks out the lunchroom and perhaps the rest of the office.
  • Ladies, even though your killer stiletto’s are giving you blisters — you might be unaware of the peutrid odour which your workmates can now smell after you have kicked off your shoes under your desk!

Principle No. 2 ~ An awareness of stationery supplies and people’s attachments to said stationery.
Something to note…. For some unknown reason people are very fascinated and attached to some, if not all, stationery items. While you may not give two hoots about pens, or bulldog clips, or staple removers or post it notes — others do.

  • Keep an eye on your own stationery requirements — it’s not the receptionist’s fault if she hasn’t come and given your stationery a personal audit every couple of days. If you are about to run out of pens — do something about it. And don’t be upset when the stationery company has something on backorder. You should have handled this a while ago to avoid being without staples.
  • In regards to borrowing/stealing others stationery. Depending on your relationship with the colleague the general rule is to NEVER BORROW STATIONERY. Unless you are adament about returning your borrowed items — most people find it frustrating to have post its stolen without their knowledge and people are still frustrated if you asked to borrow a pen, but still never returned it.

Principle No. 3 ~ An awareness of people’s feelings

We all know that feeling when you walk into a room and you can tell that the conversation topic has just been altered because of your presence and it’s not a nice feeling.

  • If you must gossip about other people in the office — always always do it outside of the office, on a lunch break (not in the tea room). NEVER on email.
  • There is no reason to treat people “below you” as if they are below you.
  • Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Being sensitive to political, religious etc discussions as your “views” could be quite offensive.
  • Being aware and considerate of staff members dietry or similar conditions when you offer chocolate/lollies around
  • “Fundraising” Lollies and chocolate etc — please do not peer pressure us into buying them.

Shouldn’t be too hard to follow right?

P.S Keep desk mess to a minimum… you will send your neat freak colleagues crazy just by looking at what you call ‘an ideal working condition’.